Missing
by planet p
Summary: Hermione Granger's family are killed by the Dark Lord's forces and Hermione is missing.
1. Chapter 1

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

**Author's Notes** This was written in 2006 and consisted of a prologue and twelve chapters but was missing an ending.

* * *

**Prologue**

Ron fell down on to his knees before the arm chair, his ginger hair covering his face and clashing horribly with the red rug that he crouched on.

His sister stood uselessly above him, a short way away, pacing and wringing her wrists. She had tried to comfort him after he had ran from the kitchen but he had pushed her away with a viscous growl. She knew it was his pain that made him angry but that didn't mean it didn't hurt. He was sobbing into his hands and the wretched sound scared her.

A sudden sound from down the hall made her look up, her brown eyes anxious and pained. Swift footsteps announced the approach of someone. A moment later a tall boy with scruffy black hair, looking almost as if he had slept in it too long, and apple green eyes obscured by a pair of thin rimmed silver glasses appeared in the doorway. His eyes traveled from the sobbing teen to the younger girl and rested on her for a moment. Her brown eyes pleaded with his. He seemed to be thinking, but a moment later reached a decision and strode across the lounge to meet the girl.

"Harry… he…" she fell short, her voice barely a sweet whisper, the sound of a bitter breeze through a willow in the dead of winter.

Harry smiled grimly as if to comfort his friend. He reached out an arm for her slight frame and placed a tentative hand on her shoulder. All resolve to stay calm and cool seemed to drop from the girl's face to be replaced by desperation. Harry patted Ginny's back gently as she cried into his shoulder uselessly.

Another family had been gruesomely killed by the Death Eaters, a warning to any who dared defy their Lord's power, for their Lord was almighty, their Lord was God among Mortals. A father, a mother, a young girl, were now no more but cold, lifeless, unfeeling, empty corpses laying on metal gurneys in a hospital mortuary somewhere. There would be charts and forms at the end of their gurneys, a crisp white sheet drawn over their bodies, and a tag on their ankle. A muggle family. There had been no sign of the fourth member, the eldest daughter. Hermione Granger was missing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

**

* * *

**

**Chapter One**

A trembling girl stood alone in the dull morning. The cut and lay of her once prim brunette hair was uneven as though savagely ripped and torn at, frizzy and matted. Her soft brown eyes were overlarge and fearful in her pale, clammy face decorated with bruises, some old and yellow tending on brown, others fresher and bluish almost purple in shade. Cuts and lashes adorned her arms, shoulders and face also, her clothes ripped and slashed in places and beneath this festering red wounds. Her face bore the newest cuts, these were deep, hinting at white bone and warm flesh torn open. Sluggish ebony red blood crept from the cuts along her slender cheek and jaw. Her breathing came ruggedly as a wretched beast on its last leg might breathe, as if every breath was dragging barbed wire through her lungs and chest, heaving through her whole body, a hollow, dragging sound coming from within the throat as she inhaled.

* * *

Poppy looked down at her coffee as she trudged up the desolate lifeless halls to the Hospital Wing she was nurse of. She gave her coffee a semi-revolted glare and stopped by a window to admire the dawn, although this exercise proved quite pointless as the windows were so high. She sighed to herself, thinking of her most recent encounter with the Headmaster.

She had been in the staffroom, searching through the cupboards for a half-way decent brand of coffee, as one approaching thirty somehow seemed to tire of drinking horrible instant varieties for a lack of interest in brewing a decent pot, obviously, she had come up short. She had settled for some dishwater brand that tasted horribly bitter and had only finished stirring her mug for the fourteenth time, telling herself that it was because it was hot and not because the coffee made her stomach churn, when the Headmaster had strolled in, casual as ever.

He smiled when he spotted the red-head by the bench and offered to make her a coffee. It seemed to take her a while to register that he had spoken at all.

Poppy had blushed scarlet, made all the more noticeably by her pale complexion, nearing on deathly – she hated it – and had gave a nervous, very brief, giggle, an edge of sarcasm barely audible. "Already got." She felt like kicking herself. She would dearly have traded her horrible coffee for a real coffee, from the Headmaster, but her stupid mouth had gotten in the way before her mind had had time to kick in.

The Headmaster nodded, still smiling, and rummaged in one of the cupboards for a mug. Poppy had used this time to excuse herself and escape. Once she was out in the hall she felt better, cooler, but this only made her angry. She hadn't even offered any 'goodbyes', had just stormed out. He would think she had snubbed him. Poppy, you idiot, she thought to herself.

She sniffed, looked up from her coffee disapprovingly and stalked off down the hall again. Why was she such an idiot when he was around? This question was easily answered, however, because she liked him. Dare she say… admired? Adore was more the word she was looking for. Trust you to fall for the first guy who gives you the time of day, she roared to herself inside, storming. He's much too old for you! He has white hair! Silver, she contested that fact with herself. Old! But his eyes are so adorable! They're no wonder we haven't seen before! But they're blue, oh so blue! She snorted suddenly. Blue, the colour of sadness, the colour of serenity, the colour of joy. Just plain old blue, damn you, Poppy!

* * *

She wandered a while longer before a scurrying like frantic nails on wood and piteous whimpering startled her. She jumped and gazed wildly around at the heavy wooden doors to her left, her eyes wide in fear.

She slowly drew her wand from the sash about her waist and held it before her, her hand shaking terribly. The sound had ceased. Silence rung in her ears. She should have continued on but curiosity got the better of her. Holding her wand steady before her she cast a great arc before the wooden doors. A slow creak told her the doors were opening. Harsh morning air bit at her skin, nipping and prodding almost painfully. Weak November light fell to the earth in idleness, rather lazily so. Wind lashed her red hair out behind her pale face. Her arms reached wide to pull the doors shut again as she strode forward, hunching slightly to put a little effort into it. Her eyes strayed from the grey sky, across the bare school yard and landed on the steps where a bundle of once clothes and pale body lay. Her hands slipped from the door handles and she gasped. It was a girl.


	3. Chapter 3

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Two**

The ragged girl sat hunched amongst a crisp white sheet and numerous heavy grey blankets covering her legs. The nurse who was in charge of the ward – and had said her name was Poppy – had told her that she would be released today.

She had watched many others come and go and now it seemed it was finally her turn. She guessed she should be glad but inside it didn't really feel like that.

How she heard it she had slept for thirty-two days on a drip. Poppy had found her on the steps, very near dead. She had been too sick to transport so Poppy had called in a Healer. There had been a lot of questions regarding her injuries, most of these by the Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore. The girl was confused. His questions were very odd. Her only answer was that she couldn't remember and this was true. She couldn't remember – anything. Something told her that it would not be a good idea to worry the man anymore than he already was. She had invented a story in her head, something about her parents dying when she was very young, something about a foster family and running away, finishing that she was done with foster families and wanted to be free. The Headmaster hadn't objected. She had been enrolled in sixth year and was sorted into Slytherin House.

* * *

Liam ate breakfast in the Hospital Wing. She wasn't allowed to eat normal food because of how long she had been deprived of solids so she slowly had to get used to eating again. Poppy said it would take about a week.

Her insides felt hollow, wrenched, and she didn't really want to eat, each bite she took felt like forcing poison down her mouth, but she knew she must eat to stay alive and to please the school nurse.

"All finished, dear?"

Liam nodded, chewing the last few bites for what seemed like forever, although she needn't have as the soup had been pureed, willing herself to swallow.

Poppy hurried over. "Splendid, all ready to go then!"

Liam took time to dress in her new school things. She stood in front the mirror and stared back at herself. Brown eyes, brown hair, brown freckles. She decided that she didn't like brown very much. It took a long while to get her hair just right, to rouge her lips enough. It seemed very important that she look good, that she didn't appear scruffy or rough and tumble. She snatched her books from the end of the bed and turned slowly to the nurse. "Well… um… see… you round…"

Poppy nodded, smiling faintly. "Yes, I suppose I will. Might you not come in every now and then, just so I can see how you're going? Perhaps for a little girl talk too."

Liam smiled. "Girl talk's really not my thing, but I'll see what I can do." And with that she hurried off to class.

* * *

Professor Slughorn was just about to shut the door when Liam hurried over, flustered and out of breath, her frizzy hair sticking up at odd angles all about her face.

"Oh-ho!" He shuffled out of her way. "You must be the new girl. I must confess, Albus did tell me about you. He told the whole staffroom in fact, right after he'd insulted our instant coffee." He shook his head sadly. "Well sit down, dear." He nodded to a seat up front. "We'll be working in pairs today."

Liam nodded and rushed over to the table he had indicated, thumping her books down on the desk and sighing loudly before plopping down in her seat, relieved. She blew her fringe up and once she had caught her breath, set about adjusting her books neatly on her desk. After a moment she stopped. A pale boy with lank ebony hair was eying her oddly. "Oh! Ermm… I'm new." She gave a hopeful smile that turned out more like 'sorry, but can't help Destiny, can you?'.

He blinked. "Right." And then he looked away again.

Liam frowned, confused for a moment, and then figuring that he was an anti-social git, returned to arranging her books neatly.

* * *

Professor Slughorn clapped his hands for silence, rather as a pre-school teacher would. Liam found that she really wasn't in the mood. She had started to develop a headache. She shut her eyes slowly and tried to breathe.

* * *

Professor Slughorn soon had them brewing a potion know as 'Mavis Mackebby' which made Liam snort. She didn't have a clue what it did but the name was definitely funny. The pale boy rolled his eyes. Liam smirked, raising her eye brows. "Mavis? What an old fashioned name! Boy am I glad my middle name isn't Mavis!"

"I really couldn't care less what your middle name is, or any other name you might have for that matter."

Liam's smile fell but she hitched it back in time. "It's Liam Bonita Jensen," she informed him.

He glared down at his desk and finally huffed, figuring he would have to say something. "Seeing as nobody on Earth could have a worse name than you do, I figure, what the Hell, I might just tell you after all." Stay calm, she told herself firmly, throttling can wait till later. He looked her up and down before scrunching his nose up in distaste. "I'm sorry, I was under the mistaken belief that Liam was a boy's name," he said without a hint of patronization.

Liam blew her fringe up. "It is."

"I would hardly classify you as a boy."

"Ya don't say?" She could have kicked herself. Brilliant sarcasm, she scolded.

He rolled his eyes again. "Severus."

Liam smirked but managed not to laugh. His name was so silly. He shot her a glare and returned to the potion they were supposed to be making. Liam, meanwhile, leant across his shoulder to see what page he had turned to. She pulled her book towards her and flicked to the same page. She leant back in her chair. "So what does Mavis do exactly?"

Severus rolled his black eyes, considering whether it was worth his effort to answer. "Exactly, Mavis does very little that would be classified as useful."

Liam frowned, her brow creased slightly. "Why's that?" Severus half scowled and rolled his eyes again as though he thought she was being terribly dumb. "The text book just says it's a healing potion," she complained.

"School books are such crap in any case. Mavis is one of those silly potions, I'm sure you know the sort, that have a vogue in households because they are generalized to treat various ailments rather than just one, therefore its effects are too mild to be of much use where real healing is concerned."

Liam rather thought he was a little annoyed with her. A boy with long blonde hair sitting not far away burst into a fit of laughter. Severus rolled his eyes and ignored this interruption. The blonde boy strolled over casually. "I hear you're new around here?"

"Yeah," she confirmed this in a glum voice.

The boy nodded and held out his hand. "Lucius Malfoy." Liam made to shake his hand. "On second thoughts," he withdrew his hand, "don't want to be getting rabies, now do we?"

Her brown eyes widened in shock. "What do you mean?"

"Sevvie is half muggle, all muggles have rabies," he replied, not in the least worried that he may offend the boy standing opposite him.

Liam didn't know what a muggle was but the way the boy was going on it didn't sound like a very nice thing to be. She gave Severus a brief glance before stepping away from him. He snorted and turned back to his potion.

Lucius indicated for Liam to step closer and leant forward to whisper something in her ear. "You know what good old Mavis is really used for?" She shook her head slightly. "Moonshine."

She frowned. "What do you mean?"

He stepped back from her and lifted his chin in Severus's direction. "Why don't you ask Sevvie?" and with that he left again.

* * *

Liam turned back to Severus. "S-sevvie?"

"What?" he snapped without turning to her.

"What did Lucius mean about moonshine?"

Severus spun around, his dark hair flying madly about his shoulders and coming to rest across his face. He brushed the hair from his eyes and took a step towards her. "You really are stupid! The only reason Lucius even spoke to you is because he thinks he can charm you into sleeping with him. Have you no intelligence at all? Do you really think I would talk to you if Lucius hadn't asked me to?"

Liam's eyes grew wide in her face. She felt like punching him. How dare he speak to her like that? "You two are sick!" She stormed off up the aisle with an idea to leave.

Professor Slughorn was by the door, talking with the Headmaster, so she resolved to return to her seat, a nasty scowl across her face.

* * *

Liam gazed around at the other student's potions, evidently Severus had made a fatal mistake for their potion was the only one in the room to have turned silver instead of indigo.

Professor Slughorn wandered over and stared down at their potion. "Oh, Severus, what have you done?"

Severus looked up now. "Mavis and me didn't get along."

Professor Slughorn shook his head sadly. "Severus, this is an assessment."

Severus rolled his eyes. "Laloli will do just as well."

"I know that, but that's not what I asked, is it?"

"No, sir," Severus replied in a bored voice.

"Very well but you've really got to stop doing this."

"Yes, sir."

Liam scowled. "He failed us? Because of you?" she demanded furiously.

Severus turned to her and shrugged. "It seems that way." Typical, she thought, that's what happens when you get stuck with a boy. He started humming to himself.


	4. Chapter 4

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Three**

Liam sat in her bed, unable to sleep. She shared a dorm with a blonde girl known as Narcissa. Narcissa seemed a little put out that she had to share her dorm, nonetheless she hadn't spoken a single word all night.

A rustling sound across the room told Liam that Narcissa had turned over in her bed. There was another seven hours till it got light. Liam lay down and stared up at the blackened ceiling.

* * *

She wished she didn't have to sit at Slytherin Table for breakfast but that was where she had been delegated because of her house. She wore a nasty scowl the entire morning. Lucius was laughing about something across the table. Liam growled and looked down at her plate. She pushed it away and stormed from the room.

* * *

Liam lay on the frozen earth, staring up at the black night and glowing stars. She sniffed. It would be holidays soon. Christmas would come soon, bringing with it snow and much joyous festivities, but Liam felt far from festive. She knew nothing of her past and it consumed her inside, as violent as a storm on the sea. She burnt so badly inside, burnt with curiosity and anguish at not knowing. Somehow she knew that she was a girl who did not like not knowing where she stood and right now she was without a clue.

* * *

She stood in front of the notice board, gazing aimlessly across the timetables, notices, advertisements and rules. One particular notice caught her eye. "Study group for sixth year girls – of all houses," it read. "Enquire with Black sisters. FYI: for all those who are either dumb, blind, deaf or petrified by the Marauders it's Narcissa and Bellatrix. PS: Headmaster Dumbledore, who I might add is so not hot, wouldn't have been very happy if we had written 'pureblood Slytherins only thanxs' so we didn't, but you get the idea, wink wink, luv yas all, even Gryffy's a course (yum yum), Bella. Ignore my sister's cannibalistic fantasies. Please come anyway. We really really need a study group so McGonagall will get off our back, Cissa. Oh and, we meet at 7 evry Thurs and Sat and sometimes Tues. Rm 118. No grosse boys. No transvestites. No drunken house-elves."

She snorted, figuring that she might as well give it a go, it wasn't as if she understood what Professor McGonagall was on about either.

* * *

She checked her watch. Seven exactly. A sudden sound made her turn. Narcissa strode up the hall towards her, silver hair flying, a number of numerous large books clutched to her chest. She looked up when she reached room 118. Her shiny grey eyes fell on Liam. She pushed her hand out for the door and it swung open. "Well, don't just stand there, silly, come inside."

Liam blushed and followed her inside. She was surprised to see that a fair few girls were already there. Her eyes fell on the blackboard where a set of rules were scribbled in a very extravagant hand.

"No. 1 – no bitching.

No. 2 – no bitching.

No. 3 – no jinxing.

No. 4 – Dumbledore is not hot.

No. 5 – Slug is grosse.

No. 6 – no boys allowed.

No. 7 – you will not be permitted if you are looking less than perfect. Bad makeup jobs are not flattering.

No. 8 – no nudity, but skimp is allowed.

No. 9 – no Beatles music.

No. 10 – Lupin is damned hot even for a muggleborn.

No. 11 – Potter and Black (my dearest cousin incidently) are so not hot. So NOT!

No. 12 – anyone pissing anyone off will be referred to Slug for therapy. Even if the rest of us have to drag them there by force!

No. 13 – Bella is HOT!

No. 14 – stripping and cannibalism is not allowed. Blame Cissa for this one, she's spoilt rotten!

No. 15 – bingeing is so not pretty, unless of course it's boys. So no drugs, no booze, no junkfood.

No. 16 – number fifteen is also a Cissa invention, so really it's more of a guideline than a rule.

No. 17 – Lupin is SO HOT!"

Narcissa rolled her eyes when she noticed Liam reading the list. "Bella is a serial list-maker. She can't help it. She feels an insufferable need to record all of her conquests in much the same way. It is quite… disturbing."

Narcissa then proceeded to introduce her to the other members. There were several girls from Gryffindor and Hufflepuff but there appeared to be no Ravenclaws. Bellatrix and Narcissa were likely the only from Slytherin House. A red head quickly stood and introduced herself as Lily Evans. A slight-looking girl with ebony hair and a hyperactive demeanor announced cheerily that her name was Sadie Nathan. A shy girl with a rounded face was dobbed in by Sadie and turned out to be Alice Andersenn. Two girls with pony tails revealed themselves to be Alazra and Meggy and fell about in giggles. Bellatrix stood at the blackboard scrawling little pictures of Lupin and her kissing.

Narcissa shook her head. "Honestly, Bella, this obsession is not normal."

Bella grinned and turned to her fair sister. "You know if it's not one thing it'll only be another. It's the way I was made, I can't help it."

Narcissa rolled her eyes. "Well he is a little cute, I guess."

Bella gave her a prize smile and continued with her scribblings.

* * *

The evening consisted of several girls coming to the front to explain certain terms or theories and after all the lecturing was done all everyone sat around a large table to attempt their horrendous work load. Lily Evans handled all the Charms questions and Bella the Transfiguration. Alice took care off Herbology and Narcissa did some tutoring on Defense Against the Dark Arts, which Bella joked should be renamed to Defense Against Moronic Half-whitted Boys. Whilst Sadie amused everyone with her stories of Divination.

* * *

It was around nine-thirty that everyone put their books away and relaxed to discuss gossip. They soon got around to 'stupid' dares the sixth year boys frequently got themselves landed in detention for. The talk suddenly turned to the 'new' girl.

Liam frowned. Bella prodded her in the arm. "So what's your story, dumpling?"

Liam shrugged. "I don't have a story."

Sadie snorted. "Sure you do, everyone's got a story."

"Well I don't."

Bella rolled her eyes. "You gay or something?"

"Bella!"

"Li-ly!"

Lily slouched, frowning slightly. "I just meant to say that… Well, that wasn't very nice."

Bella grinned wickedly. "Dah! That's the intention, doll."

Lily rolled her green eyes. Sadie piped up beside her. "So are you?" she blurted.

Liam flushed. "NO!"

Bella snorted. "Could a fooled me. You dress like a boy. You walk like a boy. You talk like a boy. You eat like a boy…"

Narcissa rolled her eyes and turned to Liam. "Ignore her."

Liam shook her head. "I am not GAY!" she retorted.

Bella leant back in her seat precariously. "Prove it!"

"I will!"

Bella grinned, her dark lips parting to flash shiny white teeth. "I dare ya ta sleep with a boy, then. What? You're not scared are you? Chicken?"

Liam scowled, her face twitched slightly. "If you're gonna dare me then I ought to be allowed to dare you."

Bella considered this for a moment. "Fair enough. I accept. I think I'll elect my dear sister Cissa the authority over our respective victims. Cissa, what say you?"

Cissa groaned. "Why do I put up with this? Alright then, I choose… Peter Pettigrew."

Bella's eyes widened slightly. "Me?" she asked incredulously.

Cissa blushed slightly. "Yes. You asked for a challenge."

Bella rolled her eyes and slouched her shoulders in a gesture that clearly said 'oh, man'. Liam bit her bottom lip. Narcissa turned to her with an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry about this. I really am. Severus." She scrunched her eyes shut immediately, muttering, "I'm so sorry," in a low voice.

This little announcement sent Bella into a fit of raucous giggles. She thumped the table loudly. "Oh, man, that's cruel. God, Cissa, who knew you were such a bitch. Poor girl, it looks as if you're stuck with Slug. Ah, it ain't that bad really, think of it this way, at least it ain't a stiff. But just you wait for Halloween. Oh, I'm wicked and I love it!"

The room was silent after this. Sadie was looking rather excited but Lily didn't appear to be very pleased. She glared at her friend for all her wonderful support that she hadn't given.


	5. Chapter 5

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Four**

Liam pushed both doors open and strode into the Great Hall. A few people turned to see who had entered. Sirius choked on his bacon and eggs. Remus dropped his Transfiguration textbook into Peter's porridge. James blinked as though not believing his eyes. Lily turned to James and saw the look on his face. She frowned and turned to see where he was looking. The spoon slipped from her hand and fell with a loud clatter to the stone floor.

Liam Jensen strutted into the Great Hall wearing a white gauze cloak decorated with embroidered briars, but it was not the fact that her cloak was see-through or very short that was attracting everybody's attention. It was what she was wearing under this. She had done her hair in loose curls that fell luxuriously about her shoulders and face with a hint of bed hair, a feat her golden brown hair seemed perfectly suited to. She wore an extremely figure hugging hot pink tee shirt that read: "C'mon, boy, make my day. Just TOUCH me." The tee shirt was ripped in various places to reveal the skin beneath. Below this she wore brilliant white hot pants and knee-high, chunky-heeled, ebony black motor boots.

The on-lookers watched as she strutted up to Slytherin Table, evil intent clearly written all over her lush, ebony-painted lips.

* * *

Liam strode over and tapped Severus lightly on the shoulder. He frowned and turned around. Seeing who it was, he frowned.

"Can we talk?" she asked, beckoning him aside.

He nodded and stood up, only just noticing what she was wearing. Lucius laughter was cut short as he too noticed what she was wearing. Liam led him a little way away from the table.

"I want a word with you," she explained.

"Oh my, a word, I believe you just had several."

"Oh, you know what I mean!" she huffed, her cheeks blushing scarlet.

"Very well." He led her further from the Slytherin Table.

* * *

Narcissa had only just taken a seat at the table for breakfast. "What are those two arguing about?" Lucius shrugged. Narcissa frowned and peered across the table. What was the girl wearing? They were shouting at one another loudly. Severus was on about some potion they had been making, they were partnered for Potions this Narcissa knew. Liam screamed that they wouldn't have failed had he not had to be so right.

"You think the whole world revolves around you! Gawd, you make me SICK!" Liam hollered, her arms down at her sides stiffly, her hands scrunched into fists. She was red in the face from shouting.

Severus grabbed her by the upper arms and shook her. "You can talk! Look at you – dressed like a bloody tart."

Liam threw him away from her. "I'll give you bloody tart! I'm not the one who's fucking gay!"

Narcissa drew in a sharp breath. What a thing to say! She winced, under the impression that Liam had finally gone to far and was about to be cursed.

Severus stood perfectly still for a moment or two at most. Liam had just drew a fresh breath when he seized a handful of her perfect hair and threw her hard against the wall. She hissed loudly and tried to squirm her way out of her predicament but he had her firmly trapped. Finally she ceased struggling. Severus continued yelling all sorts of hated words in her face.

Narcissa could see what was happening. Liam would admit defeat so that he would think that he had won. She shook her head. Surely Severus wasn't that gullible. Liam kneed him hard and made a run for it. Narcissa snorted. Obviously he had been that gullible.

* * *

Liam dashed across the hall as if the Devil were on her heels. She was halfway across the room, headed for the corridor when Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall appeared in the doorway. She froze and turned back around, desperate to escape. She came face to face with a less-than-impressed Severus and screamed. He seized her around the middle and attempted to keep her from diving under the table. The teachers couldn't give her detention if they didn't know she had done something wrong.

"No, let me go!" she hollered.

Severus smirked. "I don't think so."

"I didn't mean what I said before, you know that, I was just angry, that's all."

He laughed at her pathetic attempt. "Oh, that's a good one. Like I would believe something like that. It wouldn't hurt to actually sound as if you were sorry!"

Professor Dumbledore looked away from Professor McGonagall and scanned the room idly, nodding about something the younger woman had said. His eyes fell on the struggling pair. He frowned slightly.

Narcissa almost didn't want to look. She bit her lip so hard it hurt. Meanwhile Liam attempted to stomp on Severus's foot and he stepped back to avoid this. Somehow her foot got caught behind his and she inadvertently tripped him. They came crashing down onto the table. Liam screamed loudly. Food flew everywhere.

* * *

Across at the Gryffindor Table Sirius was having a hard time breathing for laughter. Remus was looking petrified. Peter was crunching on some toast, utterly bored. James was smiling. Lily was positively murderous. Apparently no matter how many times she reprimanded him he just found something else to do that totally eclipsed his last effort, and now he had brought poor old Liam into it. She shook her head.

* * *

Liam sat with her fingers in her mouth, her elbows on the desk, staring up at the ceiling. Professor McGonagall was giving them a good dressing down. Her anger had apparently made her blind to the fact that neither student was paying attention to her rantings.

Severus frowned. "What do you think she was chatting to Dumbledore about?"

"Sex toys? How should I know what oldies talk about?"

Severus snorted. "Thanks a bunch. Now I'm gonna have nightmares."

Liam frowned and shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly. "Mmm… I'm bored. Know any good hexes?"

For a moment Severus just gaped. "I think I've had a bad influence on you."

Liam grinned and turned to look at him, her body only half turned in his direction, gazing over her shoulder. "More like the other way round, doll."

He rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to Professor McGonagall. "Me, innocent little Slytherin tot, know any good jinxes? Hah, frigging, hah. I might actually. Hmm…" He pulled out his wand and sighed. Just at that moment the older woman pulled out of her speech and announced that they would be receiving detention every Saturday for the next month.

Severus smiled grimly and rolled his eyes. "Nothing new, love."

Fortunately for him Professor McGonagall hadn't been paying attention. She stood up now and escorted them both unceremoniously from her office before slamming the door with such force that the wall shook.

Severus blew his non-existant fringe up. "That woman sure has some issues!"

Liam snickered. Severus gave her a funny look and hurried off for the Hospital Wing.

* * *

Liam sighed and retired to the common room and threw herself down in one of the comfy arm chairs to relax. The room was deserted when she found it. "Damn it!" She had forgotten all about class. Hurrying up to her room, she snatched up her books and sprinted off to class.

Professor Slughorn nearly choked on the crystalised pineapple he was eating when he saw her. "Miss Jensen, just what are you wearing?"

She frowned and then realized with a blush that she hadn't changed back into her school things. "Gym," she lied, gazing around the room. Her frown deepened. Severus wasn't anywhere to be seen. Dumb buggers probably wagging, she thought savagely. How was she to do Potions without him? "Sir?"

"Yes, dear?"

"Can I change? I promise I'll be quick."

He thought for a moment before looking her up and down. "Yes, you'd better, run along then."

"Thank you, sir."

* * *

She found Severus sitting on the ledge at the top of Slytherin Tower. "Sevvie?" she shouted over the roar of the wind blowing hair into her mouth.

"What?" He didn't turn around.

"What are you doing over there?" She edged forward marginally.

"Why don't you come and see?"

"Can't. Scared of heights."

He snorted and turned to face her. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard."

"It's true," she shouted back, indignant.

He rolled his eyes. "I don't suppose you wanted any then?" He held up a half empty bottle of a silver substance.

Liam winced. Dumb boy's got a death wish, she thought to herself, you better go save him. "What you drinkin' Mavis for?"

He tossed his head. "Mavis? Mavis bloody who?"

She took a deep breath and edged a little closer and held out her hand for the bottle. He sighed and stood up, moving away from the edge of the tower to pass her the bottle of moonshine. "What did you add?"

"Ladenver."

"Lavender? Just lavender?"

"Yep." He swayed and held his head. "Mmm." He held out his hand for the bottle and she passed it back.

"What you upset about?"

"Nothing."

"Sevvie!"

He took another swig. "Just leave me alone!"

"No!"

"Fuck off!"

"You fuck off!"

Severus rolled his eyes, brushing the hair from his face. "You is a girl, girls ain't meant ta swear."

Liam drew herself up. "Girl?"

"Girl," he confirmed.

She prodded him in the shoulder. "And you'd do good to remember that, young man!"

He snorted, swaying slightly. "Is that supposed to be threatening?"

She scowled. "You got it!" Severus shook his head and burst into a fit of laughter. Liam growled. "Stop laughing, dumb boy!"

"What you gonna do – slap me?" he gasped through his laughter.

Liam growled. "Awww!" She turned on her heel and swept off, leaving him alone in the howling wind.

* * *

Narcissa sat on her bed polishing her toe nails. The door burst open and Liam stumbled in, giggling like a maniac. Narcissa looked up, alarmed. "Liam?" Liam threw herself face first onto her bed. "Liam?"

Liam rolled over so that she was facing the ceiling. "What?"

"Are you okay?"

"Frigging fantaculous!"

"You skipped Potions. Tell me how that is okay?"

Liam smirked. "Busy, busy, busy, always busy."

"What were you doing?"

"Pissing Sevvie off."

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, he was in a huff over some thing or another. I left him with his bloody Mavis and his bloody miserable mood. I swear there's no getting through to that boy!"

Narcissa frowned. "What?" She leant over the happy girl and placed a hand on her head to feel her temperature. "Liam?"

Liam moaned. "What?"

"Why was he upset?"

Liam struggled for a moment before sitting up. She gazed across at the beautiful blonde. Narcissa gazed back at her with a strained expression as though worried. "Pppfff!" Liam snorted. "You high or something?"

Narcissa blushed but remained serious. "We used to be friends," she told the brunette sternly, "a very long time ago before my blood started to interfere with my life and my parents decided that I should marry into a respectable, pure-blood family. Best friends in fact," her voice had lowered now, she looked genuinely gloomy for a moment, but only for a moment. When she spoke again she was back to being plain old bossy Narcissa, as cold as the air outside. "We don't talk anymore. I just thought that it may be something to do with me and Lucius. I know he's friends with Lucius but Lucius isn't really a person you could ever be friends with, not really."

Liam rolled her eyes. "Sevvie, pissed off about his dear old girlfriend cheating on him for a total hottie like Lucius?" she asked sarcastically.

Narcissa blushed even more deeply. "I am not his girlfriend and I never was, we were just friends in a friendly manner!"

Liam grinned. "Sure you were!"

"We were twelve, God damn it!" Narcissa retorted, outraged.

Liam blinked. Narcissa's hair flew madly about her face and her eyes grew so large in he face she quite resembled a toad. Her face was no longer blushed with rose but had turned a nasty shade of grey. Liam decided that she didn't like to see Narcissa angry. She plopped back on her bed and gazed up at the cobwebs forming on the ceiling. "Geez, just chill, lady. It was just a joke!"

She heard the sound of hurried footsteps, caught a glimpse of Narcissa's brilliant white cloak and then the door was slamming. Narcissa had left the room.


	6. Chapter 6

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Five**

Her first detention was with Poppy in the Hospital Wing. Poppy gave her some boxes filled with jars she was to arrange in their correct cupboards. She blew her fringe up, bored.

A little while later Poppy excused herself saying something about a meeting. She was as cheery as ever but for some reason Liam couldn't quite place her eyes seemed a little more tired than usual. Liam shrugged and continued with her task. Once she had finished unpacking all the boxes and restocking the medicine cupboards she plopped down on Poppy's desk and sat staring into thin air. After a moment she noticed a little red box sitting on the bench.

She slipped off the desk, curiosity getting the better of her, and stood before the box. She took a quick glance around the ward making sure it was thoroughly devoid of on-lookers before she pried the box open. Inside sat a single vial and inside the vial was… blood?

Liam frowned, her brow creased, her eyes slightly narrowed. What was Poppy doing keeping blood? And in a funny little box too? She picked the stoppered test-tube up very carefully, willing her hands to stop shaking. She turned it a few times in her hand before holding up to the light. It was definitely blood. It had a certain viscosity about it that recalled blood.

A sudden crashing sound from outside made her jump. It happened before she had even registered it. The vial cracked and then smashed, splintered shards of cold glass deep into her hand. She gasped and dropped the remainder of the vial. She barely registered the sound of the glass crunching as it hit the floor. The world seemed to have taken a horrible lurch. She was plunged into darkness for a few seconds before the world came back into view. Clouded and colourless at first and then the colour returned. Liam found that she had collapsed and lay on the floor, her ankle stinging terribly.

Her hand stung for what seemed like a very long time, until she felt a strange sensation as though all the blood in her veins was being pulled out like tiny fibres and then the feeling stopped and she was just Liam again, or was she? She held her hand up to her face, the cut had healed just as if it had never been there in the first place. She gasped. Inside she started to panic.

Poppy's voice drifted through to her from the hall. Liam snatched up her wand and mended the vial with one flick, another flick returned the spilt blood to its containment. Her heart beating wildly in her chest she dashed to the red box and stuffed the vial back inside, slamming the lid shut and turning away just as Poppy pushed the door open and strode in. Poppy looked somewhat surprised. "Oh. You're finished?" Liam nodded. Poppy took a deep breath. "Well then, you can go. I don't know about Minerva, but I didn't have anything else planned for you. So…" She let her breath out in a sigh.

Liam smiled politely and left, saying a quick "well, see you…"

* * *

She woke in the night, finding that she was somehow strangely drawn to the moon's rays. She was no longer tired. She took up in the window seat, her knees drawn to her chest and stared into the shining moon. She didn't know how long this lasted, she only knew that when she woke in the bitter morning the moon was gone and she felt oddly lonely.


	7. Chapter 7

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Six**

The Christmas holidays had come around. Liam stayed at school as she had nowhere else to go. Narcissa and Bellatrix went away. Liam supposed they had gone back home. She found herself wondering whether her family missed her terribly? Whether she had a family at all?

She spent a long time in bed, but she didn't sleep. Instead she moped around quite uselessly. She made up excuses to stay inside. The cold, her homework, the cold… She was plagued at night by strange dreams and whenever she saw meat she felt repulsed. She felt as if she was going out of her mind. What was wrong with her?

On the last day of the holidays she resolved to venture outdoors for a walk around the lake. It was bitterly cold and the very air itself bit at her bare skin, her face, her ankles, her neck. She walked for a long time, the crisp winter breeze urging her on.

Her eyes wandered across the landscape idly, her body frozen and stiff. And quite suddenly she had stopped, her legs simply refused to move. She stared down at her legs in panic and gasped. There at her feet… A dead and mangled rabbit, its glassy black eyes staring as though permanently caught in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle. Busy black ants crawled across the eyes and rotting greenish entrails. The stomach was ripped open and the entrails trailed away for some way. Liam felt herself drawn to the dead thing. It was a grotesque sight, yet in some obscure way… fascinating also.

Her eyes grew wide in hunger, her shaking hands reached out. She pulled herself away just in time. She was sick on a nearby tree, her chest and throat burning with the acid.

* * *

Liam sat by the fire staring into its leaping orange heart. It was all so wrong inside, like a fire had started there, a fire that could not be put out. She held out her hands to feel its warmth and wriggled her fingers.

The sound of something heavy thudding on wood made her turn. Severus brushed the dark hair from his face and tucked it behind his ear. Evidently he had some homework to finish up. He drew himself up a chair and sat down, tapping the table top twice with his wand. An ink bottle and roll of parchment appeared a moment later. He took a fountain pen from one of the inside pockets of his cloak, opened the book to the right page and began scribbling something down on the parchment. "I see you're not in bed. Still can't sleep?"

It took a moment for Liam to realize to whom the question had been directed. "I'd toss myself off Sytherin Tower before I told you anything."

Severus smiled, not taking his eyes off his work. "You just did, tell me something. You'd better run and toss yourself off the top of the tower before word gets around that you're not a girl of her word."

Liam growled menacingly. "Oh you're so smug, you stupid boy. You think you know it all."

His smile widened. "Whoever said anything about think? I have no need to think – I know." Liam wrenched herself to her feet, her eyes furious. She smiled slowly, a dangerous smile. Severus turned the page on his book with a tiny rustling sound and tucked the hair back behind his ear. "Transmetaphorical what? So much for that. Trust McGonagall to elicite some new legal way to torture her students. Pity she's too old for me…" he mused to himself. "Erk, not to mention Gryffindor. Tut, tut. All in all, not one of my better thoughts. I'm talking to myself again, aren't I? Damn! Holy mother Mary who art in Heaven's gonna be mad at me now. Now, Severus – How'd you get a dumb name like that anyhow? Now, look, you're distracting me – have you not been told enough times. One must never take the Lord's name in vain. One must love their Lord God only, and must take no other God in place of Him. One must never talk to themselves. One must never chew their nails. One must always eat with utensils. One must always brush their hair. One must not swear. One must not hate their teacher. Okay, that one's definitely wrong. Hmm, stuff it. Now, transmetamorphic regressive charms? That's enough to drive anyone to top themselves." He sniffed and turned to Liam. "You done that essay McGonagall set us for Frid'y yet?"

Liam drew herself up to look superior. "Yes. I handed it in last Saturday."

Severus blinked. "Geez, and you understood all that transmetamorraphology or whatever it's called?"

"Yes."

"Would you mind explaining how that's possible?"

Liam smirked. "Oh I don't think you could ever understand such a thing, you see, it involves actually listening to somebody other than yourself, and I don't believe that to be possible – ever. At least not in your case."

Severus rolled his eyes, much too worried over his essay to be mad at her for insulting him. Besides, she was a girl, it was not as if girls could control themselves. They just said the first thing that came to them. It was all very sad really. Severus snorted. No way was he feeling sad for no she-savage cos Liam sure wasn't human, anybody could tell him that, they all said so, all said she was crazy. Besides, it was ever so delightful to see her work herself into a right state, like she thought her glaring meant anything to him.

Liam was close now, less than a metre from his desk now. Her eyes were so wide in her face they were almost scary had they not been so laughable. She looked as if she might explode any moment, a balloon that had been inflated too much.

Severus couldn't help it. McGonagall thinking anyone would understand what she was on about, Liam thinking she could impress some altruism on him. He smirked. Girls, they were above him.

Unfortunately this did not improve matters much. Liam, catching sight of his smile, growled and dived forward, knocking him out of his seat as she attempted to choke him.

* * *

Liam smiled gruesomely. Severus looked a little surprised that she was so strong but not at all worried that she was half suffocating him. A flicker of movement in the side of her eye caught her attention. He was reaching for his wand that lay some way away. So he thought he could curse her? She licked her lips feverishly and thumped his head on the hard stone floor several times. "No. You. Don't. I'm trying to kill you here, don't you see what fun it will be?"

A hint of panic came into his black eyes.

Liam cooed. "Oh, now, don't be cruel. Don't spoil my fun with your puppy dog eyes." She frowned sadly, her bottom lip drawn up partially covering her top lip. "Don't you dare!" All softness had gone from her voice and now it was little more than a ravaged growl.

"I… apo… la… g… ise," he managed to gasp, slowly turning blue.

Liam made a great deal of looking very surprised and contemplative. "I dunno if I can accept that. It didn't sound very sincere to me."

"Y-y… orrr… ch… o… kinnn… me… h-hooow… c-c… nnnn… Iiii… s-souuu… n… si… n… c-ere…"

She sniffed. "You could start with making an effort. You think you can make me look stupid just cos it makes you feel superior? Just you try and see what I do to you!" Her terrible smile graced her delicate features once more.

"P… p… llll…"

* * *

Her wild hazel eyes grew wide, but it wasn't anger any longer, it was fear. She let go at once. She didn't blink but it was clear that she was shocked at her behaviour. For a moment she didn't breathe at all, she was too scared that she might have killed him. She almost reached down to shake him, before he tried to push her away. Realising that she was still sitting on his chest she scrambled off and sat staring into nothingness.

How could you? Why would you? Why did you? So many thoughts rushed through her head. And there was a name, a name she couldn't quite recall, but that name was a good name, and that person who the name belonged to was a good person.

She spun around to gaze wildly down at Severus, sure he was dead and she had killed him. He sat staring at nothing in particular, colour slowly returning to his face, his chest heaving. "Last time I talk to a girl," he mumbled to himself as if amused.

"Are you okay?" Liam asked in a tiny faltering voice.

* * *

Severus started and looked around as though he had heard something that had disturbed him. His eyes came to rest on hers and her relaxed. "What's it to you? I thought you wanted to kill me? Not much chop, are you?"

Liam whined and clapped her hands over her face, ashamed. "Don't say that," she sobbed.

He frowned, sure that he was going crazy. Liam didn't cry, at least he had never seen her cry. "What about you? You okay? Lost interest in your homicidal binge?" Liam gave a horrified cry and turned away from him, sobbing to herself once more. "Oh, come on now. It isn't all that bad. It's not as though I'm anyone who matters, and anyhow, I was getting bored with that dumb essay already."

This only made her more hysterical however. He frowned, thoroughly disconcerted. He got unsteadily to his feet before taking a few uncertain steps and kneeling down in front of her. He reached out a hand for her chin. She had drawn her knees up to her chin and was rocking back and forth.

He figured she could have been faking but somehow it didn't feel that way. "Hey, Liam, look at me."

She flinched when he touched her and scrambled back as though frightened. Her eyes caught his and he could have died. He didn't know what it was about those eyes but they filled him with an overwhelming sadness, a blackness so deep it seemed to have no end, and if he fell… "Why are you crying?" He tried to sound cheerful. Liam whimpered and threw her head down on her knees once more. "Liam, answer me! Please…"

"I don't know!" she roared in a terrible voice. He fell back and almost did his ankle in.

"What do you mean?" he breathed, never taking his black eyes from her own brown ones. Was there something wrong with him? Since when had he cared if someone was alright or not? Since when had he admitted that he didn't know something – ever? Since when had he been anything less than perfect when anyone enquired? There was definitely something wrong with him. Damned muggles!

* * *

Liam was shaking so much but she can't have been cold. Her breath caught in her chest for a second, for a second she seemed to fear him. She took another deep breath and the feeling passed. She was scared at what she had done without really knowing why. Why was she scared? She hated this boy. He hated her. What was wrong with that? But it was wrong, something inside told her so, told her that no matter what she could never let hate drive her actions. But it had and now she felt so wrong.

Severus edged forward cautiously. She didn't move at all. She seemed too lost in her own thoughts, still shaking madly, silent tears streaming down her face. He pulled her to him in a hug and ran a hand down her frizzy hair, desperately trying to comfort her. He didn't like to see someone that way, it scared him. Eileen had been this way everyday of his childhood, he wasn't going to let it happen to again. He hadn't understood why she was so sad, sometimes he had even been upset at her – what right did she have to be sad? The sadness had eventually swallowed her up. There was not even room for anger, resentment, just loss and pain and desperation. She ceased caring about anything, withdrew into the past, lost in the darkness. She had left him alone.

For a long time he had hated her, so much. It was not until he was ten that he began to realize that her heart had been broken and that a broken heart really could kill. It had taken away all her life, all her will for life, and left her empty, something that just continued with no real purpose, something that just existed without knowing why.

His parents had divorced when he was five, he vaguely recalled various meetings held in cold, sterile rooms, with falsely understanding smiles and sickly sweet voices. Eileen had been put in an institution once, but she had escaped and reclaimed her baby boy, when she still had it in her, but slowly more and more of her had faded away until there was nothing left. She now lived in assisted accommodation just to get her by the day.

Severus sniffed. Once, when he was thirteen, he had gotten on to hating the whole concept of love, of loving anything, anyone. He was older now, and knew that such childish assertions held no truth in reality. It was only human to love and inevitably lose and one could never pretend to be something that they were not. They could try, oh they could try, but eventually it would twist them into something inhuman which they would hate. Those who succeeded ultimately became destructive personalities, causing nothing but hate and anger.

* * *

Liam sobbed onto his shoulder uselessly. He hugged her tighter. "I'm here, I'm right here." There was no cold superiority in this voice, no sneer, he was just a child comforting his friend. It almost made him laugh. Friend?

Liam's trembling began to subside. It was a long while later that he realised she had fallen asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Seven**

Liam awoke to the sound of a window scraping. She sat up and immediately felt a coldness seize her like vice and constrict her chest. Narcissa stood by the window looking spectacularly annoyed. "Stupid. Stupid. Window. Why won't you o-pennnn?"

Liam yawned.

Narcissa spun around. Her face contorted into an ugly frown. "You're hair is shocking, like you're wearing a monster on your head or something!" She twitched her nose a bit. "Where were you last night then?"

Liam cheeks burnt scarlet as the events of the previous night rushed back to her in a storm. First she had tried to kill him, then she had cried buckets. She felt so pathetic.

Narcissa's eyes widened in her face. Her face filled with girlish delight. She dashed gracefully across the room at incredible speed and fell on Liam's bed softly. "Tell."

Liam shook her head, embarrassed.

Narcissa put on her famous 'look how dejected I am' face. That face could break a heart just seeing it. Liam continued shaking her head. "I'm such an idiot."

Narcissa smirked, all sadness gone from her face. "C'mon, tell me, please?"

"I was such an idiot."

"We'll trade. I'll tell you where I was if you tell me."

Liam thought for a moment. "Alright. You first." Perhaps she wouldn't have to tell after all.

Narcissa smiled, not a hint of blush in her cheeks. "I was with Lucius, he asked me to go for a walk with him – around the lake – and I said 'yes'."

"And?" Liam prompted.

Narcissa was pulled back from her thoughts. "We kissed."

Liam gasped. "You what?"

Narcissa turned to her now, her eyes wide, as though it had only just sunk in itself, "I kissed a boy – a cute boy! Oh my God! Oh my God! Am I a slut or what?" Her voice was excited and feverish.

Liam screamed suddenly and jumped up and down on her bed. "Victory! Whoa yeah! Down with boys!"

Narcissa fell back on the bed and gazed up at Liam's face. "Boys are such suckers," she breathed. "Adorable suckers, but suckers none the less." Liam plopped back down on her bed, the springs creaking loudly.

* * *

The next study group meeting took place the following Thursday. Bellatrix had a good laugh at how irritable she was making Liam before revealing that she had gotten nowhere with silly, old Peter.

Liam hated the thought of what she had to do just as she hated Severus himself, but she was determined that she must not fail.

* * *

_Sevvie,_

_I hear you have some ability in occulemency, an over-technical word for gaining entry to the memories of a certain subject, therefore I am writing to you to express my interest in your assistance with a personal matter._

_Should you decide to accept my offer you know where to find me. For your services I shall award you the pleasures of my body, but be warned, there will be rules._

_LJ._

* * *

Severus read over the letter he had found in the front cover of his Potions textbook. Slightly disconcerted as he was, he couldn't help but wonder how desperate Liam must have been to offer herself to him. And, of course, he was a tinsy bit curious about this "personal matter" that she had written of.

* * *

It was a week later that he replied back. Although they had met many times in class, in the common room and during meals, Liam had not mentioned the matter once.

Surprisingly, he found it harder to reply then he would initially have thought. He found that he had no idea how he should address her. "Dear Liam"? "Miss Liam Jensen"? "Liam"? "LJ"?

Once he had finished the letter he read over it once more.

* * *

_Liam,_

_Further to your previous letter, I have come to a decision. I would like to assist you with your problem, therefore I accept your offer._

_SS._

* * *

Liam read the letter that had been slipped into her Transfiguration folder, a small smile spreading across her lips. She pulled a quill, a bottle of ink and a piece of scrap parchment from her sash. Resting the parchment on her folder, which was itself rested against her knees, she contemplated what she should write.

* * *

_Sevvie,_

_I am glad that you have accepted my offer, and I don't just write this out of courtesy. And now that you have, accepted my offer, I shall start by outlining my terms. These are rules for us:_

_My body belongs strictly to me and I shall not be the possession of anyone._

_Stop means "stop"._

_You may ask me anything (and I will endeavor to fulfill your wishes) but I do not guarantee results._

_I am not interested in idle chatter._

_There will be no kissing as it is rather an unhygienic habit of humans that I detest._

_Now that you have read my terms, it would do good to reconsider your agreement. If you still wish to assist me I would be interested to know._

_LJ. _

* * *

Severus read Liam's latest letter and smirked. The girl didn't half know how to confuse a guy! One moment she was trying to hold onto some dignity and the next she was basically admitting that her fate was in his hands.

* * *

_Liam,_

_I have read your terms and I have found no extensive clash of interest. Therefore I am further inclined to accept your original offer._

_SS._

* * *

Liam folded Severus's last letter carefully in two halves and stowed it away under her pillow. Perhaps she had some slim chance at winning this bet afterall? She threw herself back on her bed and smiled. If she was lucky, Severus may even be able to help her with her amnesia. Her smile widened. Yes, for now she was pleased with her initiative and its progress. I must be a resourceful girl, she thought and then she snorted. God, I hope I'm not part of any girl scouts or anything, that would be terribly goody-two-shoe and very geeky!


	9. Chapter 9

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Eight**

Liam uncrossed her left leg from where it had been rested across her right leg and recrossed her right leg over her left leg. She was starting to become annoyed. Her mind started to wander off and with a jolt she realized that if he did show she would actually have to follow through with her promise. Her heart started to race within her chest and her breath became short and shallow. She felt her face burning. The hot rash reached all the way down her spine and burned her back.

Not in all of her scheming and planning had she paid a second thought to the fact that she would actually have to… sleep with a boy. She wasn't even sure that she had ever kissed a boy before. What if she had a boyfriend? What would he say if he found out? What would everyone think of her? Did she really have someone somewhere waiting for her to remember and come on home? Did she have a home? She would have to sleep with a boy.

She started to feel sick. How did it feel when hands that were not her own touched her? She couldn't say. Would it hurt? Would she be too afraid to follow through? She was hyperventilating. She wished Narcissa wasn't away on her date with Lucius. She needed to talk to someone. She needed someone to comfort her and tell her it would all be alright.

Something inside told her this rash, impulsive behaviour was not who she was but she pushed it aside. If she was to do this thing she couldn't afford to have doubts. She could be nothing less than certain.

Brave heart, Liam, she told herself. But still she found herself inwardly cursing that she had had to be so damned proud, so damned stubborn. She could no longer fathom what had possessed her to agree to such a ridiculous idea. You're a right clever one, you are, she scorned, you're an idiot. You know you're going to lose. You know you're going to regret. How on Earth could you do this?

But somewhere inside she knew too that she was changing. Something had gone astray, something that could never be found again. She started to sob at her foolishness, at her stupidity and her useless despairing. Suddenly it occurred to her that she may never find out who she was, she may never know and she would have to live with who she was now. Her sobbing grew louder so that she was practically wailing into her hands now.

She was such an idiot!

* * *

"Liam?"

Her breath caught in her chest. She glanced up frantically but he was not yet around the corner. She feverishly wiped her eyes on her sleeve in an attempt to cover up that she had been crying.

"Liam?" He frowned. "Sorry I'm late. I had to hand in that assignment for McGonagall and then she started on me about it being late. I thought I was never gonna get outta there until it was Easter at least."

"What's Easter?" Liam asked, hoping he would be too distracted to notice she had been bawling her eyes out only moments before.

He frowned again and brushed the hair from his face in a nervous gesture. "Easter…? Well, it's kinda a muggle thing."

"Oh."

"Something churchy, you know, when this guy came back to life or whatever."

Liam smirked. "Some guy came back to life."

"Yeah, apparently, so they believe, the churchy people."

"Pretty weird."

He smiled briefly. "Mmm, mostly it's just about economics though."

"What's that?"

Severus blinked slowly. "Economics?" he inquired. She nodded. "Money and stuff."

"Oh."

"Christmas has got presents and Easter's got chocolate."

Liam nodded. "Sounds terribly exciting."

"Terribly."

She grinned at the serious expression he was giving her and stood up. "Well, um, I don't really feel like staying here. Wanna go ta Hogsmead?"

He shook his head. "Can't."

She frowned, her brown eyes narrowed slightly. "Why not?"

"I ain't got permission from me mum."

Her heart fell a little. She had been looking forward to going into town. "Oh… right."

He looked at the floor. "Look, why don't you go on ahead without me? I'll not be lonely or anything. I can always go annoy P- I'm sure I've got enough to be going on with anyhow, homework for instance. We can talk later. Yeah?"

Liam stood half way between turning for the door and turning back towards Severus. She frowned.

"Go on," he encouraged her. "I'm not much for window-shopping anyhow."

She smiled briefly and dashed off for the door. "Um… bye… then," she called back without turning.

He nodded. "Bye."

* * *

All in all, Liam thought their little chat went okay. She hadn't dived at him and tried to choke him to death again so she thought she was doing pretty good.

She wandered around Hogsmead for a long while staring into shop fronts without daring to go inside. Counting up her loose change she decided to buy herself a lollypop from the sweet shop.

Once she even caught a glimpse of Lily and her two friends Alice and Sadie in one of the clothing stores but she thought it best not to wave. She saw the four Marauders later also and they were alone, apparently Bella's dear old cousin didn't like having her around. When Liam saw Peter on his day off she understood what Narcissa had meant. He looked a proper mope and not in the least bit cute, although he did have blue eyes and this was probably the nicest thing about him.

Lupin, Bella's new obsession, looked somewhat down-hearted also. Liam smirked, she felt almost as bad as he looked but despite everything he was very cute. She thought of Bella's list-making for a moment and began to tick off all the things one would classify as 'cute'. Golden hair – check. Amber eyes – check. Calm and collected – check. Her thoughts were cut short when the Marauders disappeared into The Three Broomsticks.

Boys, she huffed to herself.

* * *

Liam yawned and dumped herself into one of the large arm chairs by the fire, her legs thoroughly cramped from walking for four hours flat. She fell asleep a moment later and only woke when Narcissa came downstairs for dinner and spotted her. "Liam? Liam? Are you coming to dinner?"

Liam rubbed her eyes blearily. "What? Dinner? Oh, yeah." She sat up tiredly. "I am, yeah."

Narcissa smiled kindly. "How's your little…" she lowered her voice, "task coming along?"

Liam rubbed a hand across her face and moaned. "Oh, not that again."

Narcissa looked slightly apologetic. "I expect Bella will make life harder for everyone in that department. She is hopeless when it comes to social skills, I assure you, just don't tell her I told you that, I'm afraid she might tie me to one of the Quidditch posts outside, naked. She seems to have taken after Sirius in that respect, although she would never admit to such a thing. I get by trying not to piss her off too much. She can be extremely accommodating when she wants but also very nasty. Sevvie should know. One day she decided that he was trying to steal me away for his own sister. Was she ever mad? That and the fact that Mum and Dad had told her that I was not to associate with filthy half-breeds. She believes in that sort of thing, you see, and I must go along with it, just as I always have – Bella's perfect little shadow!" Liam noted a hint of bitterness for a second or two but when Narcissa hauled her up out of the seat and dragged her off after her to dinner so was back to her element, sweet and adorable in a cold, sterile manner.

* * *

Liam slept in on Sunday. When she awoke and stumbled to the bathroom in bare feet, yowling about the cold all the way there, she had acquired a bad case of bed hair. Her frizzy golden hair, a tinge more brunette than blonde, seemed to have been made for such a purpose and she hated it. She wished her hair could be more like Narcissa's, all sleek and shiny, and never frizzy.

She was in a bit of a grump when she had finished combing her hair and putting on her kohl and matte red lipstick. It would be another two hours till lunch and she was desperately hungry. Taking up on the rug by the fire, her mood did not improve very little when she spotted Lucius and Narcissa whispering to one another in the corner. She scowled, wondering how on Earth Narcissa could possibly put up with the slimy bugger. He was cold and mean at the best of times and almost always very rude, tending to believe that nobody else but him had feelings. Liam personally thought just the look of him made her skin crawl. Remembering how unassuming she had been on that first day made her want to throw up, but that just made her angrier.

* * *

She spent the afternoon finishing up her homework for Charms. The door opened and a very scruffy looking Severus swept inside. "No cheer," he told her when he saw her looking in his direction. "Darling Cissa has inexplicably found some new way to upset Lucius."

Liam stiffened now. Lucius better not have laid a finger on her friend! Her eyes widened in her face. "How's that then?" she demanded in savage tones.

Severus frowned, tucking a stray hair behind his ear. "Oh, she'll be fine, I dare say, what with charming sister Bellatrix coming to her rescue and all."

Liam scowled to herself before she resigned to finish the essay she was working on and then go and see how Cissa was. "Lucius deserves a good wake up call and one of these days," she smiled evilly, "I intend to give the slimy little bastard just that!"

Severus smirked. "I sure as Hell wouldn't like to get on your wrong side."

Liam's face fell inexplicably. All of a sudden she felt quite wretched with herself. "Oh dear, I do have quite a nasty temper don't I?"

"Don't be silly," Severus dismissed her assertion, "I think you're quite adorable really, homicidal manic tendencies aside."

Liam rolled her eyes. "You would say that, wouldn't you?"

"Yup," he chimed happily.

Liam snorted. "You really are too weird. Oh, by the way, Cissa wanted to know what you were pissed off about, you know, that day… with the whole detention incident."

Severus dropped his books down on one of the tables and sat down on the table beside them. After a moment, in which Liam wished dearly that he would stop kicking his legs about as though he was five-years-old again, he nodded, more to himself than anything, and tucked his hair once more behind his ear. "Poppy had a bit of a grump at me, that's about all."

Liam was curious now. "How do you mean?"

Severus continued staring at the floor as he replied. "I had this placement thing at Mungo's for Saturdays and that fell through. I didn't really feel like telling her that they didn't want me there cos they didn't trust me, so I said I didn't wanna do any stupid placement anyhow. I think that hurt her a lot, she had worked so hard to get this for me. I should have told her the truth but that would have only made her mad. She would storm up there and start yelling all sorts of things and before you could blink she'd be out on her ear. She deserves this job. She is good at her job. I'll live, I daresay."

"And Mavis will help?"

Severus smirked. "Yeah, funny that, Mavis and me must a had a stroke of inspiration, I have no idea how we made that one up. Poor old Mavis thought I hated her forever."

Liam wondered whether it would be a bad idea to push her luck just a little bit further. "So how come you were doing this placement thingy in the first?" she blurted out.

He smiled. He wasn't angry. "Poppy thought I'd make a good Healer."

Liam grinned toothily. "What gave her that absurd idea?"

"You actually."

"What?!"

He brushed her outrage and confusion away with a tiny, "Never mind." Even though it had been good-natured, or as good-natured as Severus went, that didn't stop her from being mad at him.

"What's it got to do with me?" she demanded angrily.

"Geez, you don't half shout, do you?"

Liam scowled. "I'm the one asking the questions here?" she stormed.

"Truly." He frowned. "Alright then, I see no harm in telling you now, and besides, I don't like the odds of this little conversation ending in you trying to kill me if I don't. Do you remember when you came here?"

Liam snorted sarcastically. "Hhh! How can I forget!"

He brushed the hatred in her voice aside. "As I heard it you can't remember much of the incidents of your… injuries. No?"

"No."

He nodded, frowning at the way she was glaring at him. "But all the same, perhaps you wish to know? Therefore I shall try to explain some of it to you." He tucked some hair behind his ear again. Liam really wished he wouldn't. He was starting to annoy her now. "As I was saying," he continued, "when you came to us you were not much for this world. Poppy made a decision not to transport you away to Mungo's. You were too unwell and she feared you may well die. A Healer was sent from Mungo's and that should have been the end of it. Your illness however, was more serious than it first appeared, you see, a number of dark curses had been placed upon you to prevent any such attempt at healing. The Healer discovered this soon after as he nearly died. Poppy was more than a little frantic, she can get like that sometimes, and it's not as though it wasn't worrying, because it was.

At the time I was still attending my Saturday placements but I believe what I did next placed me irrevocably out of trust of the whole Healing community."

Liam's breath had caught in her chest when she heard what had happened to the Healer. "Did he die, the Healer?" she asked with dread.

"Oh, no, he's quite alright, thanks to his collegues but now no one was willing to Heal you, too scared. I guess I got a bit fed up. I kinda decided to take things upon myself and Heal you myself. Stupid me, shoulda guessed no one would understand."

"You… you… Healed me?"

He shook his head slightly. "No, not properly, but in any case you didn't die and then the potions Poppy and I had devised had enough time to act to their full potential. Poppy was so mad. Dumbledore too. So what did I do? My usual thing, stomped off in a huff."

They were silent for a long time, a very long time, Liam contemplating death and dark curses and Severus contemplating God knows what.

"That's… that's kinda what I wanted to talk to you about…" Liam managed to convince herself to say.

"Your not remembering how the… that happened?"

She nodded slowly. "Actually," (Dare she say it?), "I can't remember anything, not my last birthday, not my family, not my home, nothing, it's all just blank. I don't know what to do. I don't even know me and I feel so stupid and horrible all the time. I just want to remember something, anything, my name…" she spilt it all out.

"Yesss, I could see how that could be a bit of a bother. Nothing you say? You are quite sure that you remember nothing?"

She nodded, blushing. "Nothing. Sometimes I get these feelings but I could be making them all up couldn't I?"

"Yes."

She nodded once more. "I have no idea why I just told you all that."

Severus smirked, but not unkindly. "I'll keep your secret, you needn't fret over it. I'm used to it by now." She took a deep breath, relieved, and then wondered why she was so trusting of him. It was ridiculous! "I confess, I may have a slight advantage when it comes to it. When I was able to, ah, heal you, I, um, suffice to say it's not as simple as all that. It's not just a bunch of voodoo chanting or whatever else society perpetuates. I was only able to heal you once you had accepted my offer to do so. I am not an advanced enough Healer by far to take it upon myself to heal even if the patient is unwilling. Um, sorry about that…"

Liam rolled her eyes. "You really do love yourself a massive big lot, don't you?"

"Of course. I'm half-blood, what do you expect. I have to love myself or else I won't get no respect at all." He smiled to himself.

"Brilliant logic, huh?"

"Oh fa sure, sunshine."


	10. Chapter 10

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Nine**

Liam lay back on the hard floor and closed her eyes. Severus mentioned something about establishing a connection and for this she had to be relaxed. She secretly thought that it was hardly relaxing lying on a floor that was as hard as a board, but refrained from voicing these thoughts.

"Keep your breathing steady and the rest'll follow."

She nodded and took a deep breath, held it and let it out again. What if it works? What if you find out? She suddenly felt excited and worried at the same time with the result of completely ruining her breathing pattern. Steady, she told herself, steady. Severus started to hum. She wondered if he was upset with her. She was upset with herself. Either she wanted to know or she didn't but, couldn't want both, but she did. Focusing on Severus's humming she forced herself to relax.

"You don't mind if I hold your hand," Severus asked some time later. "It helps with the connection."

"'S okay," she mumbled, thinking of a swing and a little girl swinging on it, her legs kicking madly through the blue sky. The thought was very calming despite the fact that in real life she would feel very awkward in the stomach. The little girl was happy and felt safe. She smiled slightly.

* * *

Severus took up her hand carefully. She was smiling oddly about something or other. "All set?" She responded by nodding slightly. "Okay, now just remember to stay calm. It doesn't matter what you see, stay calm. You are here, in this room now. Okay?" She nodded again. "Very good."

* * *

She vaguely heard Severus asking her to go back to the earliest memory she had, which she did. It wasn't a particularly exciting memory. She saw herself sleeping in a bed of the Hospital Wing. Across the room Poppy was filling out some paperwork and muttering about 'damn proceedure'. The girl, who she had to remind herself was her, suddenly awoke. Her brown eyes flicked open and simultaneousy widened in her face. Liam should have known what came next, but was too busy watching the girl's face, and then a terrified scream filled the room and the girl was scrambling to the head of the bed without knowing why. Liam felt her heart skip a beat and then push on, racing madly in her chest. Poor Poppy must have got the fright of her life. And then the memory was fading away, into darkness.

"Why did you scream?"

Severus's half curious, half worried voice drifted through the black to her conciousness. "I don't know," she replied honestly, and then she blushed, her insides squirming, thinking what a lame answer she had given.

"That's okay. I was just wondering." He took a deep breath and thought for a few moments before sighing. "Okay. I want you to go back to that moment, just before you screamed, and I'll see if I can't help you figure out why. Yeah?"

She nodded again, a slow dread welling up inside her, her cheeks blushed even more.

* * *

So there she was once more. Watching herself with that unreadable expression on her face. The expression took only a split second to change from expectancy, confusion, understanding and finally to fear. The girl was screaming for dear life. Liam wanted to yell at her to stop. She was hurting her ears. There was no reason to be afraid. The girl was just being irrational and it irritated Liam.

For the third time Liam watched the girl as she prepared herself for the scream she knew would come, except that it didn't. Instead the world seemed to go black, and then images were hurtling past her eyes, memories from her past, too fast and too jumbled for her to make out. A dark room. The sound of water dripping, constant, the only thing that convinced her she was still alive. Cold. So cold. Pain. In her chest. In her bones. The hard ground. Icy against her skin, like knives in her side. A hushed whisper followed by a slow scraping sound that took forever to eventuate. Light, horrible light, streamed into the room. Light burnt her eyes. Light made her gasp. Agony. Pain. Fright. And those eyes. Dark orbs shadowed by heavy lids. Kohl. Pretty eyes, but they weren't. They could have been. Feverish. A smile. Wide. Leering. Hungry. She started to shake, no she had never stopped. Those eyes and that smile got closer. "I will never join you!" The sudden scream made Liam jump. A flicker played across the woman's eyes. And then pain. Nothing but pain. The world had vanished. It was just those eyes and the pain. The pain that reminded her she was alive. Those eyes. She could never lose sight of those eyes, if she did she would slip away, into darkness, forever lost.

* * *

Liam was screaming and thrashing about madly. Severus tried to calm her, but it was no use. "Liam? LIAM? LIAM!"

She couldn't hear him. Her eyes were wide open and she couldn't see him. The screaming filled the room until it was all he could hear, and vaguely, his own screaming of her name. But she wasn't coming back.

He seized her upper arms and shook her, cursing himself for his stupidity. He had been foolish, she had slipped away without his knowing. It was just a moment, less than a second, but in that second he had lost her, she had cut him out. "Liam, God damn it!"

Someone would hear. Someone would come. But he didn't care. He had to get her back. He wouldn't lose her.

* * *

Liam was screaming and thrashing madly, but the girl never did. She was long past the point of physical reaction.

A flicker of movement caught her eye. She looked around and saw Severus. He held out his hand. She took it. Then she was being pulled away, pulled away from the numb girl and the leering woman. She fell into darkness once more, but Severus never let go of her hand. Her eyes flicked open. A strange screaming filled her ears. Severus was gazing back at her with horrified eyes. She opened her mouth to say something and the screaming stopped. Inwardly she thanked whatever divine force that had ceased the screaming. She sat up and gazed around. A frown creased her brow. Whoever had been screaming was long gone.

"Are you okay?"

She nodded, turning back to Severus, frowning at the tiny wobble in his voice. "Who was screaming? You should have told them to shut up. I've got a splitting headache."

He stared deep into her brown eyes. "You were."

She blinked, gazing back at his overlarge ebony eyes. And then she understood. "I… that… me?"

He nodded. She started to shake and the memory of that all-consuming pain washed over her. Sobs worked their way into her throat. "I don't want them to hurt me! Please don't let them hurt me!" she pleaded.

Severus hugged her. "I won't. I promise." Liam hic-cupped, tears flooding down her face. Eileen had cried once too, cried so much, and then the crying had stopped. Severus adjusted his arms around her. He wasn't going to tell her to stop crying. He wasn't going to tell her to be brave. But he wouldn't let them hurt her again.


	11. Chapter 11

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Ten**

Liam lay in her bed. Another night she couldn't sleep. Another night those dark eyes haunted her dreams. Another night she woke in the night, thrashing madly but not screaming, never screaming.

Narcissa was asleep, perfect in every way. Her hair was slightly messed up from turning over so many times in effort to find a comfier position on the bed, but always perfect.

Liam pushed her blankets away with a soft rustling and walked to the window. It was a dark night, the stars and moon obscured by clouds. It would rain in the morning.

Liam smiled. She liked the dark. Her mind strayed to girl, her former self. The girl hadn't liked the dark at first. It had scared her, she felt trapped, but then as her hope started to fade away that darkness became a friend. A good friend. The absence of light had prevented her from seeing the mess she was in, prevented her from feeling disgusted and repulsed at herself. The darkness had comforted her, silenced her pain, for the darkness cared not that she hurt, the darkness told her to rise above pain, but she couldn't. The darkness told her to forget pride and put aside loyalties, but still she hesitated. The darkness whispered to her. Do not lose hope, it told her in her ear. Be as I am. Steal your heart away within your soul. Surrender to the demons. Let them believe you have changed. Let them believe they have won. When this is done, slip away, slip away when I come, take my hand and I shall show you the way.

Liam smiled. Yes, she was not afraid of the dark.


	12. Chapter 12

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Eleven**

Liam woke early the next morning. It had rained in the night and the air was filled with the tang of earth and brown that came afterwards. The air was alive.

She bounced out of her bed and bounded across the frozen floor to wake Narcissa. Narcissa moaned. "I'm too tired. Take the next stop. Come back later…"

Liam smiled resignedly and skipped off to breakfast. The Great Hall was almost deserted owing to the early hour. It was still dark outside. Liam headed for the Gryffindor Table before realizing that she was in Slytherin and correcting her course, rolling her eyes at her self. What a silly girl! She lay down on the bench and watched as darkness lifted from the ceiling and twilight turned to dull morning.

A scurrying, scuffling sound made her sit up. She rubbed the back of her head where it was numb from the hard wood.

* * *

Four boys entered the room and took a seat at the Gryffindor Table. The door dark haired ones, Sirius and James, were pushing each other about. Remus, the mousy haired one, gave them a reproving sigh and buried his face in a book. Peter, the only blonde of the group, hummed to himself absent-mindedly whilst reciting spells for a test they had later in the day.

Liam rolled her eyes. Boys!

Peter stopped suddenly and turned to Remus. His eyes grew wide. "Damn it!" Remus frowned and gave his friend an odd frown. Peter stomped his foot loudly. "Well that's dunnit, innit?" Peter huffed.

Remus shook his head. "Peter, are you feeling quite alright?"

"Do I look or-right? She's gunna kill me!"

"Who?"

"McGonagall! Oh, I am so gunna be dead!" Peter fell back into his miserable mumblings.

Sirius looked around at his friends. "Quit skulking, Peter. McGonagall don't eat people as far as I know."

Peter sniffed. "I feel really reassured," he commented.

Remus was still shaking his head. "What are you two on about?"

Sirius smirked and then chuckled. "'Memb' me tellin' you about that little prank we pulled in Herbs when you and Jamie boy were off talkin' ta that sheila."

"The career consultant? Oh. Yes, I remember now. Go on?"

"Lasky did 'er bean and gave us 'tention with the Mac. She gave us these stupid essays to do about safety and responsibility and all that crap."

"I take it you haven't done yours either?"

Sirius burst into raucous laughter. "Nah, man, what d' I look like? Lily Evans, up-and-coming saviour of the modern world?"

Remus frowned and shook his head for the third time. "Not to worry, Peter, if McGonagall's gonna make you into stew at least Sirius'll be in it with you."

Peter rolled his eyes. "Thanks a bunch. I'm the fat one. They'll cook me first. They'll have to feed Sirius up before they cook him."

Sirius and James snorted. "Mmm, yum," they chimed together, "Peter stew."

Peter huffed. "Geez, I love you guys so much sometimes."

Sirius grinned. "That's what we were made for."

"Better not let Evans hear you saying that," Peter retorted. "She'll have you for her evil lab experiments."

Remus thumped his book down on the table loudly. The three boys turned to him. "Will you quit it already!" Remus stormed. All three grinned and resumed their breakfast. Remus rolled his eyes. "What did I ever do to deserve this?" he mumbled to the enchanted ceiling.

* * *

There was a girly scream from the door and Bella dashed over the threshold and pranced towards the Gryffindor Table. "My own dear cousin!"

Sirius turned to glare at her. "Ah, cut it, woman, can't you see I'm eating here. You're gonna make me hurl."

Bella grinned. "All the better for me!"

James and Remus remained strangely quiet as though they didn't dare take Bella on. Peter rolled his eyes. "How about I throw my pumpkin juice all over you?"

Bella stopped suddenly and frowned. She blinked and turned to her cousin in utter shock. "He speaks?"

Sirius snorted loudly. Peter blushed scarlet. "Well at least I haven't failed my sixth year three times!" he retorted.

Bella grinned in wonderment. "I never knew… he really does talk. Do you think perhaps Lily pie found a brain for him?"

Sirius grinned and glanced across at his friend. "I think Evans needs to find a head for you!"

Bella rolled her eyes. "But I like being mindless, just like my pwetty pwetty dearwest baby boy cousin!"

Sirius growled and chucked an apple at her, which missed. She skipped off happily, both Peter and Sirius glaring after her.

* * *

Liam pretended to be absorbed in her breakfast when Bella came over and plonked herself down opposite her. "Liam? What an unexpected surprise!"

Liam looked up as those uncomprehending. "Hi," she grumbled.

Bella rolled her overlarge eyes. "I don't think poor old chubby likes me very much. Poor poor Pweeter." She grinned. "I'm gonna win, you know."

Liam nodded. "Sure you are."

Bella crossed her arms smugly. "That's right so you better start getting acquainted with dear old Slug."

Liam scowled. "Slug's better than Pweeter any day!" she growled. "At least he's got some brains and regard for other people, if only for an ounce!"

Bella stuck her tongue out. "Stupid, stupid girl! It doesn't bleedin' matter when it comes down to it. They all say I've got no heart, and they're right. A stupid heart would only get in the way! I'm lucky in that respect, I guess. No stupid boy is gonna keep me from getting what I want! I've got my higher aims, and boys might be fun but they don't make up for a lack of heart, I assure you! One day… One day… Boys are only good for one thing – manipulating. Boys are idiots, you see. Sleep with them once and they think it means something. But it don't, cos the journey don't matter, what matters is the end!"

Liam pushed her breakfast away. "Thanks for the chat, but you're sorely disappointed if you think that I'm gonna let you win that easily."

Bella laughed leeringly. "Pwoor liddle Liamminy's gonna cwy is she?"

Liam scowled. "You just wait. You'll see!" She turned on her heel and stormed off, cursing herself for letting the girl wind her up.


	13. Chapter 13

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer **_Harry Potter_ and its characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter Twelve**

"You're sister's crazy, you know that?" Liam gazed across at her blue-eyed friend. Narcissa turned away from watching Professor Flitwick to regard Liam for a moment. "She has been damaged by life. Don't let her charades fool you. Somewhere deep inside there must still exist a human being. I cannot forget all that she has done for me. She is my sister and no matter what happens, she will always remain so. Perhaps she is crazy, but I still hold hope for her. It is all that I can do."

Liam frowned, ignoring the tiny professor altogether now. "Why don't you leave, run away, do anything, just get out?"

"Because I want to bring her back. I know one day that I will succeed and she will wait for me. If I ran they would only find me, even in death. I cannot escape my blood for it is what gives me life. I am not a brave person Liam. Instead I wait and pray. 'One day' I always tell myself. There are only so many days. One day I will get my wish." She sighed gloomily.

Liam glared down at her desk. Something bad had happened, she could feel it. "Cissa?"

Narcissa turned to her, smiling. "Yes?"

"What happened?"

Narcissa did not try to deny it. "My parents have promised me to Lucius. We will be married when the year is out and I am free of this school."

Liam's stomach turned over and her heart felt as if a stake had been driven through it. All this time she had been complaining about her own miserable life and Narcissa had let her. "You can't! You have to run!"

Narcissa shook her head slightly, smiling. "I will not run. You cannot mend people, you see, they must mend themselves. I am cursed with this love for these people who care nothing for me. Perhaps I am foolish but I am what I am. I know it will turn me one day, but all I can do is wait. I will not go the way my dear cousin has, I will not hate and resent. It causes too much pain. I prefer to accept my fate rather than fight the stars."

Liam shook her head, her eyes massively overlarge. "But it's wrong!"

Narcissa mused for a moment. "I hurt too, you know, but I will not hurt the ones I love by fighting a battle I cannot win. Perhaps when I am dead and gone they shall think back and say, 'Yes, we have been unkind, but now that we know this, we know too that we can change.'"

Liam thumped her hand down on the desk. "You're all FUCKING crazy!"

"Miss Jensen!"

Liam glared down at the teacher. "Fuck you too!" she roared, with that she seized her books and stormed off.

* * *

It wasn't fair! It just wasn't fair! Why did she have to hurt so much? Why did she have to scream and shout about things she knew nothing of? Why did the world hurt its children? "To let them know they are alive." She screamed and lashed out at the wall, kicking it. She screamed again. "Fucking Hell! I hate you! I fucking hate you!"

* * *

_A prologue and twelve chapters – done! If you'd like an ending – liked it, hated it – let me know._


	14. Chapter 14

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer** I don't own _Harry Potter_ or any of its characters.

* * *

_So, I'm a bit out of touch with the world of Harry Potter & Associates, and, more importantly, this story, but I'll give it a shot, and we'll see how it goes._

_Fingers crossed, here goes…_

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen**

The fresh ones were better; always better. In body, Liam sat with her back to the wall she'd moments, minutes earlier kicked and pounded in anger; in mind, she raced through that field, on the tail of a scared rabbit, as though she were possessed of the wind herself. She'd have that tasty rabbit too, for her own dinner, fresh as a wink and so, so delicious!

Wood-coloured eyes snapped open, mid pounce, and she found herself sitting on the hard floor, her back pressed to a hard wall, as her chest heaved rhythmically. She'd been about to kill that poor rabbit, she'd been about to eat it alive and feel, as the twitching finally ceased, as its muscles seized up, as the heat of life let its blood, its cold, dead blood in her mouth, coating her teeth, like thick, red jelly.

She raced to the nearest bathroom, careless as to whether it was girls' or boys', and was violently ill in the basin.

* * *

Narcissa was going to ruin her life, to allow circumstance to ruin her, and, worse still, Liam thought, as the retching subsided some, she was going to let her; she was going to remain quiet. Cissa's mind was made up, and causing a fuss would only hurt her further.

_A true friend could not do such a thing_, she thought, and so she would keep her silence; she'd not be happy for it, she'd not be joyous for Lucius or Cissa's family, she'd hate them all, for as long as she breathed, but she'd breathe no words of interference or dissent. She'd be the good, quiet friend. She'd go to Hell, when her time came.

Somehow, it already felt as though she had.

In her mind's eye, she saw herself killing Lucius, saw herself ripping his throat from his neck with a single bite, and she saw Cissa's wand, pointed not to her head, but to her own head, and then a brilliant green light, for a moment, staining her teeth, the whites of her enraged eyes, green, then Cissa's light body, falling softly sideways to the ground, lifeless.

She would not kill Lucius, she'd have her revenge in the afterlife. Lucius would get his lot then, and Cissa would finally be freed, as guilty and as innocent as any.

* * *

Peter stopped for breath, but now he could no longer see the Quidditch stands, or the field that lay inside, where he'd watched his friends, James and Sirius, practising what seemed, to him, only moments ago. His breath was ragged and shallow and hurt his throat to inhale or exhale, oh goodness, and his chest! He had a fobbin' stitch, didn't he? "Why are you following me?" he shouted, though the sound came out as it pleased, with no thoughts for his pleasures, and in a violent rasp. "Please, just leave me alone!" he implored.

Bella paused some metres short of him and straightened from her easy canter, and waggled her finger at him.

Peter rolled his eyes, though even that action seemed painful, and he ducked and rested his hands on his thighs, clutching his legs and breathing heavily. "For the love of baby Jesus, what do you want?"

Bella picked at the nail of her index finger with that of her thumb, her heavy, dark-eyed gaze cast downward, then, suddenly, fixed to his face. "Just you," she replied plainly.

Peter's watering eyes narrowed, tears running in rivulets across his cheeks, and from his chin. "What do you want me for?" he asked, drawing in a nasty sounding breath.

Disgust raced unguarded across the sharp planes of Bella's face. "Pleasure," she seethed, her grin flashing sterile, white teeth.

Peter laughed breathily, a sharp outtake of breath. "Now, I'm not the brightest flame in the fire, but even I'm not dull enough-"

"You're a moron!" Bella roared, cutting his words off before they'd even had the chance to leave his mouth. "You're a hideous, utter imbecile!"

Peter scrunched up his eyes. "And you're going…" he prompted slowly, but encouragingly.

"I most certainly am not!" Bella shrieked.

"Ah, you're in love with me!" Peter decided, and returned to his earlier upright, standing posture.

Bella blinked in horror and physically stumbled backward.

"Be careful you don't fall," Peter told her.

She growled. Her eyes flashed. She batted her eyelashes. "And I… confess an interest," she replied delicately.

Peter scratched his neck and wiped tears from his face with his hands, peering at her through his fingers. He laughed loudly.

"I find that I am attracted to you in a way that is more than simply caring," Bella confessed.

Peter widened his eyes, amused. "You're attracted to misery, Bellatrix," he told her. "Miserable eleven times out of a dozen, as I may be, I am not its shadow. One finds that it is shadows most often forgotten, yet most often loyal. I am one of the Marauders, I am, if you will, for lack of a better word, something of a celebrity; one quarter of the very definition of young, misguided and famous. Disliked, abhorred, if you will, but never ignored. Loyal only to mischief, and food."

Bella's face turned up in a scowl as she produced her wand from within her robes.

"Oh, yes!" Peter cried. "Curse me! Do you know what happens to margarine when it's left out of the refrigerator? It melts! But by all means, curse me, do!"

A growl emitted from Bella's throat, her face twisting into an ever more horrible expression.

"I hear your little sister's marrying Malfoy," Peter said. "Naturally, I wondered after your thoughts."

The hatred and anger slipped from Bella's face, and the bitterness from her tongue. "The family's well liked, well to do, some may even say popular. It is an arrangement, as any other, and entirely Cissa's decision. I could not have Confunded her into a more natural response." A pitiful, amused laugh tumbled out of her mouth.

Peter slowly met her eyes. "I'm sorry."

She returned her wand to her robe swiftly. "She's not your sister, you've no reason-"

"She's somebody's sister," Peter told her.

Bella nodded, dropping her eyes to the ground. That much was true; she was her sister.

Peter took out his wand and waved it in front of him sharply, so that a bunch of awkward, white flowers appeared before him, which he had to stoop to catch, then straighten again. He walked toward Bella, the flowers, kept together by a brown elastic band, held out in front of him. "My mother taught me that one," he conveyed, "it's one of the few I've hung on to."

Bella lifted her eyes to glance blankly upon the white flowers, then opened her fingers, indicating her acceptance. Silly, plain things; not at all pretty.

Peter passed her them.

She wrapped her fingers about their many, cold stems, and as she did, a strange thing happened, the funny, dull flowers changed, taking on shapes and colours she couldn't say she'd seen all of before, and she frowned, gazing upon her bright bunch of flowers for a long moment, then up into Peter's face.

Peter recited the charm, as if he'd read her mind, and she repeated it dully.

She would remember it.


	15. Chapter 15

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer** I don't own _Harry Potter_ or any of its characters.

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen**

Harry half-turned to Ron, then glanced at Kisha Talbot, the 23-year-old Auror whom Tonks had worked with in the past and had been assigned by the Order to assist them on their quest to destroy the Horcruxes. Kisha came highly regarded, and she was a brilliant conjuror of magic.

Harry let his shoulders drop and then turned fully to discuss what to do next. (He missed Hermione. He'd have preferred it have been Hermione, but, for all they knew, she'd been killed by Voldemort's Death Eaters. For Harry, it was all the more reason to win this fight. Hermione, and the rest of known humanity. Yeah.)

They needed to be sure; they couldn't do this twice.

* * *

"You don't have to marry him, Cissa." The words lingered on the edge of Bella's tongue as she met her sister in the Great Hall for lunch, but did not leave. She let her gaze roam for a moment, not wanting to even look upon Lucius, and found that her eyes had gone to Gryffindor Table where her cousin, Sirius, sat with his friends. Her gaze moved over the four boys to rest on Liam.

She wondered how far Liam had gotten on her dare, and if she'd actually have the guts to go through with it. She'd been looking sickly for some time, but, in the light of Narcissa's current troubles, Bellatrix couldn't bring herself to wish any more ill upon her opponent; she was too tired, and too angry.

Usually, when someone or something made her mad, it charged her up for action, but now all it seemed to have done was drain her of all her energy. It was, she assumed, because she knew that she'd be fighting against the winning side. Cissa would always obey the family, and, in the end, so would Bella. Like her younger sister, she'd have no choice.

For a silent moment, she felt a glad warmth that Sirius had finally escaped the entrapment. But then, he'd chosen Gryffindor, and that choice had been the most defining decision of his life, though he'd only been a boy, the family had held it against him.

Bella had chosen to stay in the family's good graces; she'd felt a real thrill to please them, and to see Sirius disappoint them time and time again. The thrill wasn't the same anymore, the power trip had twisted her, and some days she felt nothing but tiredness.

She felt so tired, now.

Her eyes threatened to close, then, and she snapped them to alert and straightened up, reaching across the table for a fried chicken wing.

She needed to eat, and time to think.

* * *

Her time for thinking was interrupted by McGonagall. Wand-thin and looming, she informed Bella that she wanted her to assist Pettigrew in completing an essay he'd been set for detention. She was reputed to be one of school's most prodigious essayists.

The compliment, coming from a Gryffindor, should have been like a slap in her face, and at least elicited a sneer, but she only reached for a drumstick and took a bit out of it and began chewing.

After a while, McGonagall left.

She sent Cagney Gomma, their Head of House, to re-ask her.

Annoyed, she agreed. (Couldn't they see she wanted to be left alone?)

* * *

She met Peter in the library. (He was reading a muggle comic and she was able to sneak up on him to peek.) She watched him for a few moments, colouring in the colourless comic, before announcing her presence with a palm placed flat to the tabletop beside him.

He glanced at her hand first, then up and around to her face.

She grinned and conjured the chair across the table to cartwheel up into the air and land down beside her, and took a seat. "No shit, that was cool," she sniggered, "get your essay out; I'll take a look."

Peter shrugged, putting the colouring pencil down. "I haven't started; I don't have one."

Bella glared, her voice a reinforcement of her irritation. "And why haven't you started, Pettigrew?" She used his last name purposely, to remind him of what his teachers called him.

Peter shrugged again. He'd picked up the pencil again and was twirling it in his fingers. "I didn't get it, and I don't like essays." A twitch crossed his face. "Remus was going to help me, but he's busy with his own stuff at the moment."

Bella dropped the glare like it was a heavy weight, or a load of bricks, and smiled, as though to a small child. She stuck out her hand.

Peter frowned, confused.

"Need someone to hold your hand?"

Peter made a face, but took her hand with his left hand, which he crossed across his chest. He was right-handed, and she happened to be sitting on his right side.

"Get writing," she mouthed, and dropped her head backward to look up at the ceiling. At that point, boredom was a comforting companion.

* * *

Liam lay on her bed and stared up at the ceiling. She'd eaten about as much as she could take without bursting, and she felt lousy rotten for it, but she was still hungry. She felt like she was dying she was so hungry.

She barely noticed when Narcissa left their dormitory, probably to meet with Lucius.

Liam closed her eyes and lifted her pillow up and plastered in over her face. Her muscles hurt, but her eyes hurt more. When she'd looked at herself in the mirror that morning, she'd been horribly pale, and her veins protruded like ugly, long spider's legs, and her eyes had been red-tinged.

It was all the anger and bitterness, she supposed. It was eating her up.

Her humourless laugh was stifled by the pillow over her face.

* * *

"It doesn't even matter," Peter declared, as Bella was studiously checking over his spelling and grammar mistakes with an eagle eye.

"It matters if you don't want to be the laughing stock of your peers," Bella told him. "Take it from me, it doesn't get easier just because you're repeating, it just gets dung boring!"

* * *

Liam lurched off her bed, board-stiff. The pillow fell to the floor as she half-lurched, half-lumbered across the room, toward the door. Pulling open the door, she loped out into the corridor.

* * *

Bella hummed the Graft's _Strain_. It was her favourite song at the moment, and everyone else pretended to hate it, so she especially liked it all the more. "What sort of music do you like to listen to?" she asked Peter.

"Orchestral," Peter replied, frowning down at his essay.

Bella burst out laughing. It was probably the funniest thing she'd heard all week. "Why?"

"I dunno," Peter admitted.

Bella laughed again. "My parents had me take lessons when I was younger. I played the oboe." She couldn't believe she'd just told someone else that, let alone a mudblood Gryffindor! "Do you play?"

"No, I write. I've never had that talent."


	16. Chapter 16

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer** I don't own _Harry Potter_ or any of its characters.

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen**

Severus woke in the middle of the night. At first, he thought it was the wind, then he realised that it was breathing, heavy, ragged breathing. That was when the thing broke out of the shackles of darkness and lumbered at him, looming large and menacing.

There was something about the way it moved that convinced him that it wasn't a prank, and he lit his wand quickly. The sight that greeted him turned his stomach on the spot.

It was a person, no, a girl, but she was all purple and green and her skin was scarred and disfigured, and-

"Petrify me!" the girl rasped, as blood rambled from her mouth, new teeth pushing the old ones out as he watched.

He wanted to be sick, but he'd only just realised that he knew the voice.

Tears filled his eyes.

Liam!

Liam launched herself onto him, knocking him backward onto the bed, and snapped at him with new, two-pointed teeth, and it was all her could do to fend her off with his hands and keep her from chewing on him.

Her eyes were completely grey.

A flash of black light, like invisible liquid in the night, leapt out of the darkness and Liam fell limp on top of him.

He pushed her off him and struggled to sit up.

Lily's hair was wild and her eyes looked strange. She'd just cursed someone. "I followed her here," she breathed, without seeing him. "I saw her in the bathroom, throwing up, and I followed her. I've sent for Dumbledore. You need to understand that there's something very wrong with her."

Severus shook his head. He didn't care what she said – she'd just cursed his friend!

"She was throwing up her intestines, and, when she was choking on them, she took hold of them and pulled on them."

As the image of that came to Severus, and the gleam of Lily's eyes met his, his vision started to look dark in the edges, as though the light were being sucked out, and he passed out.

* * *

Lily didn't know what happened to Liam after Dumbledore had come, and, in a way, she didn't want to know. She was sure it couldn't be anything good, and she just wanted to get the images from that night out of her head. She couldn't tell James, of course. She couldn't tell anyone, except Dumbledore, so she kept it to herself.

She couldn't even look at Severus for remembering it all.

When anyone speculated as to Liam's disappearance, she let them. She hadn't the willpower to lie, and they'd never guess the truth if Severus kept quiet. She had a feeling, he, like her, would do exactly that.

Something terrible wrong had happened that night, and, maybe, if it was never spoken of again, the horror of it would eventually abate.

* * *

After the departure of Liam, Bella had seen no reason to keep on with the dare. She'd also noticed that her sister's mood had dampened beyond belief. When she was not keeping up appearances for Lucius, she was near catatonic.

Eventually, Bella gave up trying.

She had her own life, too.

* * *

In the beginning, Bella's life had been about herself, and her younger sister, Narcissa. Then, as Narcissa's mood had gotten darker and darker, Bella had found herself both drawn to her and repelled from her. She could not be around her because it didn't change anything, but she couldn't abandon her, either.

The highlight of the Hogsmead trips had been terrorising younger students and making trouble, but, today, she decided that she'd just duck into the sweet shop and pick up Cissa some things, and some sweets for herself, too.

She just wanted to pretend that everything was fine. If she did that, then everything _would _be fine.

* * *

It was at the sweet shop, Lila's, that she walked into Peter and nearly knocked him over. (She didn't go to Honeyduke's. Honeyduke's was for Gryffindors and babies. She couldn't stand the crowds or the noise!)

She had to grab a hold of Peter so that he wouldn't fall over, and so that she wouldn't proceed to fall over him, after that. She pulled a face. "Well, you might watch where you going!" she scolded, then frowned. "Go borrow Potter's glasses!"

"They're optical," Peter replied. "They wouldn't work for me."

Bella rolled her eyes. "Well get a move on, tubby! I'm trying to get through here!"

Peter shuffled aside and she let go of his arms, as though only just remembering she was holding them, and squeezed past him to hurry away along the narrow aisle.

At the end, she stopped, and turned back around. "Show me!"

Peter frowned. He didn't catch her meaning.

"Show me what you write," she added.

Peter smiled and tilted his head. "Oh, no, I don't show anyone."

"I'm not anyone," Bella told him. She whipped out her wand. "I've got a wand."

Peter laughed.

Bella put her wand away, annoyed. "I'll buy you sweets," she offered.


	17. Chapter 17

**Missing** by planet p

**Disclaimer** I don't own _Harry Potter_ or any of its characters.

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen**

Bella hadn't played the oboe for a long, long time, but she decided to give it a try then. If she got good again, maybe it would cheer Narcissa up.

Not that she would admit it, but she even sort of liked some of the stuff Peter had written.

She hadn't meant to start to like him a little bit, she hadn't meant to like anyone like that, it just sort of happened.

Of course, she never let on to anyone.

* * *

Severus just kept thinking how Narcissa had come to him that night and asked him to look out for Lucius for her, and then, how she'd told him that she knew that Lucius was mixed up in darkness, but that she cared for him and she couldn't bear to see harm befall him.

That was how he'd been with Liam, in the end, he supposed. If he'd only just done what she'd asked and petrified her, he might have been able to secret her away, out of the castle. He might have been able to help her.

But he couldn't think that way, he supposed. He would do as Narcissa wanted, as his old friend wanted; he would look out for Lucius.

There wasn't much else for him to do. He'd never be able to think about Healing again knowing how he'd failed Liam. He should have known. He knew he should have known.

A _real_ Healer would have known!

* * *

She knew Peter would never have told, he wasn't the sort to boast, and she knew that she hadn't let on, she'd not been acting out of sorts in any way, but Lucius had been following her, and she'd been stupid to believe that just because he was marrying her little sister, that he gave a damn about his new family.

He saw her as competition for Cissa's affections, so he'd had to go after her; had to try, in any way possible, to ruin her.

She'd never loved anything the way she'd loved that baby, but Lucius had taken care of it with one wave of his wand. The immense pain had stopped her from retaliating, from anything, really, and she'd just lay there.

She wished she could have refuted him, but she'd still be in shock; she'd been so taken unawares by his accusation. (She knew, then, that it was her fault as much as his. She should have told him he was lying; she should have hexed him into next year; she should have done something. She should have saved her unborn baby!)

But what was worse even than her baby, was what they did to Peter. It wasn't just that they made him forget her – she'd not even told him about the baby yet, she'd been saving it for a special moment – but they'd damaged him, changed him; he wasn't her Peter after that. He was someone else's Peter.

He'd never be her Peter again.

* * *

It was much later, many years later, in fact, that Severus met Lily again and they really talked. She'd married by that point – James Potter, of all people – and was working in St. Mungo's.

She told him that he was too good of a Healer to give up on it, but he only walked away. How could he listen to her when he saw her again, as she was that night, wand still outstretched in her hand.

But, the thing of it was, she'd saved his life. She'd saved his life, and, together, they'd ruined Liam's life. They couldn't know what had become of Liam after that, but they both knew that it'd been nothing good. They were in it together, accomplices.

He could not think of his own dreams after having a hand in such a thing, in the destruction of someone else's happiness.

He could only see her face, over and over again, and the wild, untameable look in her eyes. It wasn't because she'd just killed someone, but it was because she'd condemned them. Perhaps, in a way, that was worse.

So he walked away.

As much as every step he took killed him again.

* * *

For his part, Lucius believed that he was doing right. Severus longed to kill him, to spare him, for Narcissa's sake, but she'd never understand that he was helping him. But Lucius was his friend, too.

But, no, he would never do that. He wasn't brave enough for that. He'd never openly declared himself a betrayer by doing so. As much as the next person, he still had to live.

He had to find Liam, and save her.

* * *

Alone in a tall, upright tank filled with green liquid, with only a stream of bubbles to cast movement within the liquid, a blackened body floated, its eyes completely grey.

Those eyes saw everything, and nothing.

There was nothing to see in that part of the Department of Mysteries.

**End**

* * *

_Thanks for reading. If you've the inclination and the time, why don't you leave a review?_


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